Olivia is the fourth most popular name from 2010. Of course, I didn't know it was so popular when I picked it. I had baby names picked out forever (just like every other girl in the world).
When we found out I was pregnant Nick said to me "it better be a boy. And we're naming him after my grandpa and my best friend," which his grandpa's first name is also Nick's real first name, Charles...middle name would be Ryan after his best friend who passed away from cancer. I wanted to name him after my grandpa and my dad, Vincent James...which eventually changed to Maverick Vincent James.
For a girl, Nick didn't have a whole lot of input, just things he didn't like. I like Tabbitha and Samantha. But...Tabbitha was our old dog, so it seemed kind of weird to name her that. And my nephew is Samuel, and I didn't want two Sammy's in the family. A friend, Mitzi, suggested Olivia. I loved it...but decided to go with an obscure spelling (cause my name is spelled weird too). I found the spelling on a baby name web site, which claimed this is the original french spelling. Sounds good to me, I'm french and her middle name was going to be french, Chambosse, my grandma's maiden name. Olivea Chambosse was her name for a while. But Nick didn't like it. "People will call her Shamoo. It's bad enough we are naming her after a cartoon pig." At first I was really upset about this. I had my heart set on it. Even when it was time to sign her birth certificate I thought about changing it back to Chambosse and not telling Nick.
Then one day my other grandma's favorite song came on the radio. For some reason, every time I heard this song, I sang it to my baby bump and felt like it was written for her. The song? "The Rose" by Bette Midler. I sent Nick a text "what do you think about Rose for her middle name?" His response "I kinda like it. My grandma's name is Rosemary." Finally! We agreed.
I know it may be strange to some people, but I have a strong attachment to music and lyrics. And when something gets you like that, it just feels like fate. The song to me...is about two people who grow love, and that to me was my daughter. I think any parent can tell you, you don't have a clue what love truly is until you have offspring.
If you know the story of CC and Nick, it probably makes a whole lot of sense. We were like a lit match in a dry forest....burning everything in site. And then, we hit some flame retardant. But we worked on it for this little person that was growing inside me. We worked and worked and worked. And I can say, there were days when I wondered what the hell I was doing. Why was I with this person? I could do this on my own. So we continued to work at it...and we still work at it. And now when I am sitting there with the two of them just relaxing and watching TV, I feel like that is my happy place. I feel grateful to have them both. And this always runs through my head....
"when the night has been too lonely
and the road has been too long
and you think that love is only
for the lucky and the strong
just remember in the winter
far beneath the bitter snows
lies the seed that with the sun's love
in the spring becomes the rose."
I am by no means an expert on relationships, but I do know this....do what YOU feel is best. So many people said Nick and I would never work. And there were days when I thought those people might be right. But we didn't give up on each other. We still have a long way to go, but I think we're happy....yeah.... we're happy :)
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